It may not often take more than half a minute, but it’s worth every second— such is the short but sweet tale of a woman’s climax.
If you’re the average person, chances are you’d be spending around 20 seconds in orgasm this week. When you do the math, that only amounts to a minute or so a month… and a brief 12 minutes in heaven for an entire year.
So over a typical— or rather optimistic— sexually active lifespan of 50 years, you’ll be rewarded with more or less 10 hours of orgasm. Help yourself on a regular basis, and you might just have a chance to score up to 20-30 hours worth of climaxes.
At least that’s what Jonathan Margholis, author of O: The Intimate History of the Orgasm, would tell you.
That seems to be a rather low rate of return for something that requires a lot of effort. Yet centuries upon centuries of human imagination (and activity) have held an obvious fixation with these fleeting moments of pleasure. We’ve explicitly carved its memory on cave walls, weaved it into stories of the origins of the universe, and painted it into walls of the grandest architecture, frisky al fresco style.
Is going out with a bang really worth all the hype? The answer is a reverberating yes. As we toe the line between two opposing sides of heated debate, you’ll realize that there’s more to the female orgasm than you previously thought.
Pardon my French
The ecstasy of orgasm hails from the Greek words organ and orgasmos, and later on the French word orgasme, all of which simply mean “to swell or be excited.” But that hasn’t stopped us from waxing poetic every time we try to define it, if only to erase entirely its most negative connotations from recent history.
In the English language, we commonly refer to it as the climax to imply that it’s the most exciting part of any sexual encounter, just like every plot development. The French have added a more dramatic flair to it: la petite mort, which can be literally translated as “the little death.” As if to say that this breathtaking finale makes them die a little each time— before the overwhelming wave of pleasure recedes and gives new life.
A French physician named Pierre Briquet coined the term la titillation du clitoris, which we now refer to as the clitoral orgasm.
To make matters a little stickier, the experience also varies from person to person. So, needless to say, any attempt on a single, overarching definition for the orgasm will always be a stretch. But experts can agree on the physiological effects nonetheless: It’s an explosive release of sexual tension accompanied by heaving chests, rising pulse rates, and faltering grips.
Contrary to popular belief, men aren’t the only ones who can ejaculate when they achieve an orgasm. When their G-spot is stimulated, some women can also release a milky or watery liquid from their paraurethral glands near the urethra.
The rush of hormones that we get from an orgasm remains to be the most potent, popular, and socially acceptable drug we consume.
But there are certain facets of the orgasm unique to the female experience. For one, our vagina “tents” or elongates, and the tremors are more intensely felt in our pelvic basin due to the contractions of our genital muscles. Women are also capable of consecutive orgasms so long as we’re continuously being stimulated.
One thing’s for sure though. Getting in touch with yourself is the only way to figure out what works for you.
The whole shebang
If there is anything that makes it harder for us to put a finger on our orgasm, it’s how it never comes in just one shape or form. There are many types of female orgasms, all of which can be differentiated by the part being stimulated, the sensations you feel, or how many you’re able to ride out.
You’ve certainly got a number of options to choose from whenever you’re feeling a little adventurous.
Playing the part
Which part turns you on the most during your sexcapades? That could very well point out what you can stimulate to get some of those blissful orgasms.
The fastest and most common way to the Big O is through clitoral stimulation. That small mound peeking in between your labial folds is just the tip of the iceberg, yet it’s a bundle of 8,000 nerve endings whose sole purpose is to give you pleasure. Why not put it into good use?
Of course, you might be most familiar with vaginal penetration, but it’s hardly the easiest option of the bunch. It may be the kind that men fancy the most, but don’t feel disheartened— on its own, it doesn’t really do the trick for every woman. Still, this orgasm remains to be a powerful experience that shakes you to your core.
Women reach their peak of sexual desire and ability in their thirties, while men get to theirs much earlier at barely twenty years of age.
If you prefer laying on your stomach, you might want to give anal orgasms a shot. It’s definitely possible to get a burst of pleasure from behind, even though we don’t have a prostate gland like men. Just make sure to use a lot of lube for a smoother ride; your butt won’t naturally lubricate itself, unlike your vagina.
Other erogenous zones apart from your genitals can also be sensitive to touch. You might even feel deliriously good just by stimulating these parts! If you’re not sure, then it’s about time you start poking around to see if you like kisses down your neck or a stroke down your lower back.
Want to take things up a notch? Rumor has it that there are women who can peak through the power of their own minds alone. A little imagination goes a long way, indeed, at least for these gals who literally live in their own sexual fantasies.
All the feels
Even the sensations all over your skin whenever you hop in between the sheets can lead to varying forms of climax.
If you have a partner that would love to play along, you can let them do all the work and focus on getting a relaxation orgasm instead. You literally don’t have to do anything while you’re being sexually stimulated. Allowing yourself to let go is probably one of the more thrilling parts of this kind of orgasm.
On the other hand, when all you have is your own company and a little too much time, squeeze your thighs in together for a pressure orgasm. Some girls say that rocking your hips back and forth against a solid base (a pillow, perhaps) could help you get there even faster.
The last kind is something you see a lot in the movies. Everyone has encountered the classic depiction of dripping sweat, tensed muscles, and clenched jaws. After contracting all your muscles while anticipating the climax, the tension orgasm explodes as your body dramatically releases all that pent-up energy.
Please come again
Can’t choose your favorite among the different types? You’re more than welcome to mix your favorites for an entirely new experience altogether.
All you have to do is stimulate various pleasure spots at the same time, particularly your clit and G-spot. When you get it right, you’ll be digging up a treasure chest that’s commonly known as the combination orgasm.
And if you’re curious to see how far you can go, it is possible to get many orgasms as you can within a short period of time. One of the best parts of being a woman is that, unlike men, we don’t have a refractory period or required downtime after one orgasm. By all means, please come again… and again!
Do try this at home
How do we get the most out of getting it on? Do try this at home, of course.
Yes, folks, that isn’t a warning. It’s a word of encouragement! If you want to get in touch with the entirety of your sexual well-being, here are a few tips to get you started:
- No need to rush. Make sure that you and your partner are mentally and emotionally prepped so that any form of sexual activity would be consensual. If you’re willing to make time for it in your busy schedule, then you should also take into account how it can affect your relationship.
- Go the distance. Here’s the fun part: actually doing it! Try to experiment with your bodies to see if different positions, sensations, or rhythms turn you on and give you the most pleasure. There is no right or wrong, just what works.
- Find the right tools. Even if you’re already familiar with what makes you tick, there’s still always something new you can try. You’d be amazed at what human innovation has come up with these last few years, such as the coolest vibes, condoms, and lube (wink wink).
If you really want to know more about where the female climax can take you, it’s best to get familiar with it yourself. After all, experience will always be the best teacher. And when it comes to the short but sweet orgasm, every second counts.
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- Female Sexuality
- Your body, Your temple
- Self love
- Sexual well-being
- The Brain, A power organ
- - Clitoris
- - The Vagina
- - The G-Spot
- Erogenous zones
- What is an orgasm
- Types of orgasm
- How to orgasm
- Female masturbation
- Orgasm FAQ
- What is sex
- Sex drive
- First time sex
- How to have sex
- Types of sex
- Sex positions
- Sex FAQ